Tales from Hogtown - Fear & Loathing in Alachua County

The place was disorganized as f***. Went to take a p**s and get some water at half time. Lines were so long I missed the touchdown and didn’t get back to my seat until after half the 3rd quarter was gone. People behind the counter must be union workers at the DMV.
You aren’t kidding. I was in section 40 (on the canes side) and couldn’t even get in the cooridor at half it was so **** packed. Nobody could move. I just said **** it, I’m not missing a single second of the waxing and took my drunk, dehydrated *** right back to my seat.. where I then decided to shout to anyone that could hear “to turn the heaters on… it’s not hot enough.” …as we marched to go up 31-10 and watch the exodus of loser *** gator fans heading home.

Then there was the one lady two rows behind me who couldn’t handle my trash talking and started getting lippy (in the first half). I just laughed and told her to make sure she was there in the 4th quarter to tell me these same things. Do you think she stayed??? Hahah… negative!

I was happy to usher those ***** out for the entire second half letting them know which way the exits were.

So many glorious parts of the day! **** the gator! And **** that dumpy *** cesspool of a stadium.

….and all day today I wished I was there doing it all over again.

Onward! Go canes!!
 
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You aren’t kidding. I was in section 40 (on the canes side) and couldn’t even get in the cooridor at half it was so **** packed. Nobody could move. I just said **** it, I’m not missing a single second of the waxing and took my drunk, dehydrated *** right back to my seat.. where I then decided to shout to anyone that could hear “to turn the heaters on… it’s not hot enough.” …as we marched to go up 31-10 and watch the exodus of loser *** gator fans heading home.

Then there was the one lady two rows behind me who couldn’t handle my trash talking and started getting lippy (in the first half). I just laughed and told her to make sure she was there in the 4th quarter to tell me these same things. Do you think she stayed??? Hahah… negative!

I was happy to usher those ***** out for the entire second half letting them know which way the exits were.

So many glorious parts of the day! **** the gator! And **** that dumpy *** cesspool of a stadium.

….and all day today I wished I was there doing it all over again.

Onward! Go canes!!
i was in section 34 visitor side and the crush of humanity at halftime was 2 minutes from breaking out into the Who concert in Cincinnati with 25 or so dead people.
 
for all the **** talking their fans do and act like they are the best fans in the country, they were leaving in droves at halftime. security folks kept reminding them there was no re-entry, and they all just kept on walking. Was hilarious to watch and ask where they were going
 
If I understand this correctly, their stadium is a hit, sticky ****hole with insufficient dining options and not enough bathrooms. Also, the aluminum bleachers are miserable and there's no shade at all.

I'll try to remember this next time I'm grabbing a fried chicken sandwich with pickles and bacon at ***u in HRS.
 
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If I understand this correctly, their stadium is a hit, sticky ****hole with insufficient dining options and not enough bathrooms. Also, the aluminum bleachers are miserable and there's no shade at all.

I'll try to remember this next time I'm grabbing a fried chicken sandwich with pickles and bacon at ***u in HRS.


Had this discussion with my brother, as there was a bit of "poor behavior" on the part of a few people at our tailgate.

While I wish Hard Rock was a LOT closer to campus, there are certain advantages to playing in a stadium that has sufficient parking and bathrooms and food options.

We loved the Orange Bowl for the atmosphere and the winning. We did NOT love the Orange Bowl for the parking and the bathrooms and the food.
 
At first I was like:
didnt read family guy GIF


Then I was like:

Shocked Bad News GIF
 
i didn't make it to the CIS unofficial tailgate. i stayed at my cousin's son's house too late cooking a pig Cuban style and then when i realized what time it was i ran to the stadium to get in when the gates opened. yes. i am the guy that watches the warm ups. why not? i did so from the shade because i wasn't going to bake for 1.5 hours.
 
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I was so trashed and feeling so good I didn't even bother with any of the gater fans. I just celebrated and celebrated and celebrated. It was stupid ******* hot and the stadium sucked but no ***** were given. Just inside our tunnel there was a beer door that was hidden by a massive lemon ice line so it never took 5 minutes to get a beer. Did I already say that I celebrated and celebrated. Right away you could tell what the score was in the game, even if the gater fans didn't get what was coming yet. I didn't bother with them at all unless they were a hot chick.
Got my homie to drive us back to the campground and I was face down, palms up in the rack maybe 15 minutes after we got back. It was a good day!

Thanks for the tailgate spot @TheOriginalCane !!
 
Kudos for traveling into Bat Country to confront The Enemy. To much Bad Craziness and violent methamphetamine freaks who are offsprings of the Whitaker and Kallikak families in that home crowd for me, without a headful of acid, quart of bourbon, and some decent golf shoes to get through all the muck.
Me too. Let the kiddos use the tickets. After Gainesville and Trailerhassee, I have seen the armpit of Football fans. No mas.
 
Had this discussion with my brother, as there was a bit of "poor behavior" on the part of a few people at our tailgate.

While I wish Hard Rock was a LOT closer to campus, there are certain advantages to playing in a stadium that has sufficient parking and bathrooms and food options.

We loved the Orange Bowl for the atmosphere and the winning. We did NOT love the Orange Bowl for the parking and the bathrooms and the food.
Man I absolutely LOVE the HRS amenities ... once you get past the chain link prison type fence separating the parking lot from the stadium. Pre game been in the Club lounge after some tailgating is great ... and a half time burger / dog and beer in the AC while catching up on other games is nice ... very nice. So many college stadiums absolutely suck outside of the field itself (ie, BC).
 
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My first trip to Gainesville. Not surprisingly tHe SwAmP is trash. Bleacher seating in 2024? Yuck, the audacity. The hottest I've ever been at a game, by far. Felt like I was baking before the game. After the demolition of the Gators the walk back to the vehicle was something I will never forget. The eerie sound of silence. I have never heard a college town so silent leaving a stadium. It can't be that quiet on a Tuesday afternoon. I've heard moments of silence louder.
 
And there's this tall white dude in the next seat over who, even though he sees the other people LEAVE my seats, has decided to appoint himself the Interim Ticket Checker. Out of nowhere, without me saying anything, he demands to see my tickets. So I told him "no" and proceeded to set up in MY seats (knowing full well that the seat numbers were also painted on the seats nearly 100 years ago).

 
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Some of you seem pretty familiar with Gatorland. Here's an AP article on Napier’s tenure in today's mullet wrapper.

Question do they really have basements in rural central Florida? Or is this something else he got wrong?

“I think ultimately a loss early can be a blessing if you don’t waste it,” Napier said. “We got to go to work on the football part. I think we got to become a more consistent team, and we have to execute better.

“If we can focus on those things and not necessarily what some guy in his basement is saying in rural central Florida on social media, then we got a chance to get better. I think that’s the key. Sometimes you deserve criticism. I have no excuses. We got to go get it fixed.”
 
Some of you seem pretty familiar with Gatorland. Here's an AP article on Napier’s tenure in today's mullet wrapper.

Question do they really have basements in rural central Florida? Or is this something else he got wrong?


Basements are INCREDIBLY rare in Central Florida.

It is possible to have a "basement" if you don't dig down. If you have sloping land, or if you build an "above-ground" basement (and then cover it up), you MIGHT have a "basement" in Central Florida.

Fun fact, the tunnels below Walt Disney World were built ABOVE GROUND and then covered with dirt ecavated from the nearby lake (Seven Seas Lagoon).

Magic Kingdom "Utilidors":

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